By Rev. Robert Henre
So much of the time we are taught to live by an “either/or” approach to life. You can have green beans or corn. You can play sports or do something in the arts. You can go to school or work.
This “either/or” thinking bleeds over into other aspects of living as well. You can go to church or pursue recreational activities on the weekend. You can go to youth group or stay home to hang out with friends or study.
But what if you applied “either/or” thinking to relationships? You love either this child OR the other one. You care for either this parent or your other one. How sad and ridiculous would that be? (And, how tragic and damaging it is when we actually do live this way!)
That is why I say, “There is beauty in the ‘AND.’”
To love all of your children; to care for both of your parents; to pursue sports and the arts. There is richness and beauty in that approach.
In some houses of worship you will hear people say, “You have to choose between sports/arts (or school) activities or church or synagogue.”
What I want to say is, “Why not both?”
I think it is vital to help our children, youth and adults to have well-rounded lives by pursuing all things that are good. Living an “and” approach to life means doing the soccer and softball and theater and lessons and arts and also attending your respective house of worship, children and your ministries, and ministries which feed our souls.
Don’t take care of your body and not your soul. Don’t stretch your mind and not your heart. Don’t push your children to pursue recreational activities, and then when it comes to the things of God say, “Well, it is your choice to attend.” Help them find the beauty of the AND.
I know regular practices of faith including worship, study, prayer and being in community with other people of faith enriches our lives for the good. It can give us strength. It can inform us on how to make better relationships. It can offer opportunities to make good friendships, AND it deepens our relationship with God. AND you can live it out on the ball field, the school classroom, your neighborhood and in all aspects of your life.
There are many ways each of us are pulled these days. Time is always a precious commodity. It is easy to default to “or” thinking and action.
But living an “AND” approach takes work. Living a balanced life is difficult, but it is well worth it.
Few of us would go weeks on end without eating a meal. But many will allow weeks to go by without sharing in worship, prayer or study.
Did you know that nationally, the trend is people either attend nearly all the time or they go to their house of worship once every six weeks? If they do not attend at all, then it usually takes a crisis for us to begin to look toward God.
Do not let that be you. Determine now to live the “AND.” Feed your soul, expand your heart and mind, and serve others daily. That balance is central to life. Whenever life takes a turn that helps us to learn, we ought to admit it has been a good day.
The best way to begin is begin. (Rather profound, huh?)
It may be rough at first. There may be time crunches and challenges along the way.
But how we spend our time and invest our energy ultimately shapes who we become. That is the beauty of the “AND.”
Rev. Robert Henre is pastor at Seabold UMC.
