Island native Ariel Meadow Stallings parlays her ‘bridentity’ crisis into a book.

Ariel Meadow Stallings was having a “bridentity” crisis.

Faced with decisions about floral arrangements, catering and an invite list, all carrying a heavy price tag, Stallings felt lost.

“Am I the only bride on the planet who doesn’t want a puffy white dress? Are we the only couple who don’t want to spend the price of a new car on an afternoon party?” Stallings asks in her book, “Offbeat Bride: Taffeta-Free Alternatives for Independent Brides,” of the experience.

Then it hit her: there was no need for the expense and stress of the “marriage-industrial-complex,” when she could have an alternative, inexpensive wedding that better suited her tastes and personality and that of her husband-to-be, Andreas.

The dress code was “wildly creative casual.” Vegan food was served at dinner. Stallings made her own dress, and she and Andreas danced and hula-hooped the night away at her mother’s Bainbridge Island eco-retreat, Sacred Groves.

“It was bizarre, but it was totally perfect for us,” Stallings said.

Even better, the nuptials and honeymoon together cost a meager $6,000 – compared to the $30,000 cost of the average American wedding.

With “Offbeat Bride,” part memoir and part guide for those planning their own weddings, Stallings hopes to help other couples facing the same issues she and Andreas faced.

“I was not one of those women who fantasized about my special day,” she said. “There is a bit of irony that I am the one writing it, but the book is for people like that.”

Stallings began her career as a freelance writer in 1997 and covered the rave scene in Los Angeles for three years as executive editor of Lotus, an electronic music magazine.

An experienced blogger, she has since earned a living helping companies such as Disney and Jobster.com set up blogs on their web sites. She has also become a commentator on lifestyle topics and has been interviewed by media sources like NPR’s Marketplace.

A true Bainbridge native and born in the Winslow Clinic, Stallings’ hippie roots left her unsure about the institution of marriage.

“We decided if we were going to get married, we would do it our own way,” she said. “The weirder the wedding, the more it reassured us that although we were married, we did it on our own terms.”

Stallings found that drawing from her and Andreas’ community of friends, they were able to cover many of the large expenses a wedding entails.

A family friend made their altar, another friend made the cake and Andreas, an ex-DJ, brought in two buddies to provide music for the party after the ceremony.

“The gifts of time and service transformed our wedding from a fantasy day into a community event,” she said. “It was not just ‘I do, you do.’ It was ‘we do.’”

Stallings credited Bainbridge’s unique blend of culture, naturalism and what she sees as a still-thriving hippie atmosphere.

“This is what makes Bainbridge Island special, something like this could only happen here,” Stallings said. “I see Bainbridge Island as the quintessential place for offbeat weddings. It is a strange place to be from, but I love it.”

But, in researching the book – interviewing more than 50 brides and even some grooms – Stallings discovered how relative the term ‘offbeat’ really is.

For those who do not want hula-hoops or crazy costumes at their wedding, the book and Web site still have much to offer.

“People are going to complain no matter what, so have the wedding you are happy with and it will all work out,” she said.

In addition to the book, Stallings is now dedicating significant time to her book’s web site, www.offbeatbride.com, which “provides an interactive dialogue and resource guide for people planning their own ‘offbeat’ weddings.”

The book is directed towards those like herself, who want to plan a truly unique, personal ceremony.

“Freaks get married too,” she said, “and those people need help.”

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Nouveau nuptials

Ariel Meadow Stallings will read from her book “Offbeat Bride” at 1 p.m. Feb. 10 at Eagle Harbor Book Co. To plan your own “offbeat wedding,” see www.offbeatbride.com.